Giving and receiving support

Growing up, Katelyn McInerney had trouble helping her peers understand her sister’s special needs. McInerney’s sister has bipolar disorder and attention deficit hyperactive disorder, and at times, she did not know how to cope with her needs or the questions she would get from other students.

“I had been thinking about how my experience growing up with my sister, Erin, was a lot different than my friends’, and how there were probably other people who had similar experiences,” said McInerney, now a junior at Mountain Brook High School. “That made me think that I should make a network of people who have gone through the same experience and create a support group for them.”

In pursuit of her Girl Scout Gold Award, the highest achievement in Girl Scouts, McInerney chose to create a group for others like her: Special Siblings. The monthly support group offers a place for siblings of individuals with special needs to learn communication and coping strategies, McInerney said, and allows an outlet for people facing frustrations or hardships similar to what she experienced.

“My goal is to first and foremost create a network of people who feel comfortable sharing their experience together, and sort of have a base of people they can rely on sharing with,” she said.

The group meets once a month at Homewood Public Library, and it is open to a range of ages and communities. Because the group is in the early stages, everyone who attends meets together, but as the group grows, McInerney said she hopes to divide groups up by age. 

“I think as it grows, we’ll probably have different areas for the different age groups. For the younger kids, whose parents just want to expose them to the idea that their sibling is different, just getting them accustomed to the idea,” McInerney said. 

For older participants, a psychiatrist will attend meetings and discuss any issues or concerns that group had, she said.

Special Siblings meetings have all followed a similar format, McInerney said, starting with an ice breaker, an activity and then a discussion led by a local psychiatrist who is volunteering their time. At their December meeting, participants created ornaments that held slips of paper with positive messages about their siblings.

“We want to cover not only the negativity that can sometimes surround having a sibling with special needs, but definitely the positivity that can come with that — the patience, the empathy, things like that,” McInerney said. “Sort of spreading how that is a positive experience, so it’s not that ‘this person is different,’ but that ‘this person is unique and has special qualities.’”

Since starting the group, McInerney said, she has received positive feedback from meetings as well as return participants. Even in her own life, she said she has benefited from talking to others.

“I’ve definitely seen personal benefits, just from hearing about other peoples’ different experiences and how they’re different than mine,” McInerney said. 

The group’s next meeting will be Sunday, Feb. 4 from 3:30-4:30 p.m. The support group meets in Room 110 of the Homewood Public Library. For more information, follow@specialsiblingsbham on Instagram.